Welcome to the heart of chaos

I finally got word from Leeds today, one of the most respected schools for Medieval Studies in Europe.They don't want me. While I had stellar references and an above average interest in the school my grades and written work was not up to Leeds standards. Also a lack of formal Latin training would make it unbelievably challenging for me to overcome in a graduate school setting.

This hits a little hard for me, this is my first rejection letter I've ever gotten. I knew that out of the five schools I applied to that I would not get into all five but after Nottingham accepted me I had a bit of an Ego boost and this just cut me down to size. It's not the fact I was rejected, but also my work needs improvement. And now all that crosses my mind is that if Leeds didn't want me then St Andrews, the school I'm hoping for will say the same thing. I feel so insignificant compared to these schools, like why did I bother applying? I know, I'm being self critical and a bit of a cry baby, but when I hear that my written work needed such improvement I can't help but feel like a dunce.

On the plus side I have at least one school accepting me, so all is not lost. I have somewhere to go. I just have to pick up the pieces of that fragile ego and come out of this better for it.

So Bill canceled his class today thus gave me the day off. Rather than putz and twiddle my thumbs I decided to get a few things done. I went out and grabbed a new pillow (left my other one at Aresa's >_<) some toiletries and a couple other random items. I also found some kettle corn at bed bath and beyond and that made me happy. I eat that stuff like air. But I didn't realize till I got back just how much one extra day could give you. I'm sitting now about to start a paper thats due next week but beyond that I'll be caught up with allmost all my reading and work, its awesome. I stil have to use this break reading for a paper but I knew that coming in. Whats also nice is that my wow guild has taken the week off to recoop as we prepare for the next content patch. The extra time wednesday and tomorrow night will be fantastic for me to just chill. I'll probably just end up doing some grad school apps but thats allmost done too.

I also took my old creative zen out of my car and started to charge it, since it had been there for months. I don't want to compare it to the island of misfit toys but thats what happened. It became obsolete after I got the iPod and I never bothered to keep it around. Well today I'm going to sync it and use whats remaining for a extra HD since its a whopping 60gb model. I'll also end up plugging it into the 360 for some decent tunes while playing. Speaking of which I'm playing a lot more these days. I love the arcade as a cheaper way to play smaller games when I'm not at the lair playing Resi or Street fighter. I have still yet to crack into Watchmen but I want to play that co-op.

So here's to hoping I can finish the paper tonight, that way saturday is allll mine. enjoy the nice weather!

For the last two days my Gmail has been acting up. For some reason the SMTP server for outgoing mail seems to not respond when i send stuff and all the info online says ports. I try these to no avail. So does anyone know why Apple Mail wants to be a d-bag?

Senior Thesis: Draft 2 in progress
Love Sex and Marriage: Written and Under review
Medieval Lit: Written and awaiting revisions
Early Middle Ages: Topic selected

The worst is over and done with, 1 paper to research and write and 3 to revise. I can live with that since I'll only have 4 finals and 2 are Harper's.

The winter break will be interesting between Nancy, steampunk work(assuming I can get that going) and work with some gaming in between. Nice and relaxed before the final semester. After this weeks of interviews for the game room, I'ma need it.

Wow: Level 80, Happy and excited for so much I still haven't seen. I think I've found a nice balance between my consoles and my MMO.

Good console game to look for: Mirrors Edge, Left 4 Dead and Fallout 3

Time for the last quiz of the semester, then a solid block 4-10 of interviews.

Edit: Forgot the whole reason I started this post, I'm swaping over to gmail as my primary mail source. yaaay

Sky Pirate + Steam punk= yes?
Click for a larger version

I need a little help with my design, I'm a little new to the steam punk Idea and this is what I've got so far for my sky pirate motif. Leave comments if something is unclear or criticisms. Thanks XD

For clarification its a vest over a formal shirt. Bags are on the side for ammo and such. I'm working on a gun design at the moment but trust me its a big one :p


Version 2

I've started the actual writing of my seminar paper this weekend and it's going....well actually.

At first I was intimidated by the fact it was a 25 page research paper. the most I've ever written is 10 in a piece of prose. So I had to plan it out to stretch out my work to fit the bill. I'm about 10 pages in with about 50% of my outline completed. I'm actually on track! there are spaces for fluff if I need them to get to the minimum 20 pages but if I get into my main argument( haven't even gotten there yet) then the last 5 pages will be nothing but my own rantings on the concepts of legendary figures and the acceptance in society and blah blah blah not yet! You'll just have to wait to read my finished paper on how awesome Blackbeard was...even though he was a giant dick.

Beyond that I still have 3, 5 pagers due by finals week. But if I can write a paper in a weekend like I normally do, I'll have 2 done over break. So that's my thanksgiving break plan: Girlfriend, papers and maybe work.
Medieval Lit: Working on topic
Central Middle Ages: Working on Topic
Love Sex and marriage: Comparing courtly love to Robin hood (HA ARTHUR AND ROBIN HUR HUR HUR)

Nancy has me looking into steampunk recently...I really wanna design an original sky pirate outfit, I just need to get out of this weekend alive and maybe I'll post some sketches I plan to do later.

WOW: Getting excited for the expansion....So glad the seminar paper won't be looming on my head past wednesday, that's when its due XD My Paladin is looking badass and I can't wait to start getting some kick ass new gear. I'm looking quite tribal atm. 80 HO!

I've rambeled long enough, I'm about 2,000 words away from 20 pages so hopefully I can beat that out between today and sunday night. I need a break and thank GOD for trueblood sunday.

My head runs in like overtime right before I sleep all the time. So last night I had a bout 300 ideas and now I can only remember the most prominent. None the less, it's stuff I should commit to text. Just in case I forget.

Last night before I went to bed I cleaned out my desk drawers with old papers from last semester and my Tupperware bins to clear room and get some ready to go home so the last time I go home I have less crap to pack. I found so much crap I was looking for, like papers and pens. Not that I bought extras, but its nice to know they are there. I guess I only have myself to blame there, since I never fully unpacked the Tupperware. But now have a fully empty one that will be going home to be a new home for my sewing supplies instead of crappy Jo-Ann's bags. I'll be doing something similar at home, since I know I have my stuff everywhere. It's just hard when your clothes, desk, books and other things are in a separate room on a separate floor.

I'm exited for the concert on Friday(Pillows), since its my first one that I actually decided to go to and actually know the band. Much better than sitting in a Hendley lecture.

Classes are going awesome, I've hardly seen an 80 or B. Since I'm taking all 200 level up it makes me feel a bit proud. I'm starting to be able to hold my own. I have a lot of papers coming up so this will start being my crunch time, papers in almost all my classes. So this break will be work/reading for me to get a paper out of the way.

I don't know if I have an inner interior designer with ADD or what but I all ready am planning the next set up for my room. I switch it like every semester, and it gets better each time. I guess its just slow ergonomics at work to adapt to the times. We'll see how that works out.

Now that Apollo Justice is done I'm caught up on all my games, which is odd. I usually have one on the back burner. Guess this break will be good, since I can use it to rent a few titles I wanted to try, like Professor Layton, Zelda, and a few minor 360 titles. Oh and Crisis Core, need to pick that puppy up. Sometimes being a VII fan is a pain in the ass.

Oh and I need to take back my Guitar hero III wii box so I can ship that sucker back for $130. Yeah, that's going towards th macbook. Need it more than a mono video game.

Car update: I can now drive at night thanks to jerry-rigging wiring. For those unawares, my car's headlights were busted for some unknown reason. First we thought it was a bulb issue. Replaced those and no luck. New Alternator(Creates current for car) and still no luck. So my father and I inspected the battery and wiring to find battery acid had leaked unto the wiring for the lighting system and nearly took out the whole electrical system. That would have been costly. So I'm all fixed and cleaned up.

School work status:

• Harper paper: Ideas down and mostly done with research
• Jensen Action analysis: Complete
• Hendley critique: Needs cover sheet and source page
• Hendley research paper: Need ideas

Work: Only worked a few hours while I was home but it was good to see the EB games gang again. Glad to see that we got back our 'take out' service so i took home Bioshock for my 360 and played the crap out of it. Still think that it needs a sequel.

Other than that its been pretty routine around these parts. I'm trying to get most of that work done so I can try to get back to some art, plan some costumes or something like that. Nana reminded me that I should be getting back on the costume ball, I have cons over the summer I want to try to go to and so far all that's new is Diego. Maybe Air Gear? Another Ranma? Avatar?(NOT SOKKA) Smash Bros?(Thanks Black Marth for planting that evil seed in my head) I've got to really think out what I want to.

Oh, Pillows are playing in NYC in March. Anyone interested?

I was thinking of posting this to myself, but what the hell. I'll be editing this as I remember stuff. So you know...just ignore it.

( I need a better paying job )

Thanksgiving: Awesome. Well that is until dessert. The whole family was doing great with football on TV (Jets got there ass kicked...gwar) and plenty of wine and beer. Then my cousin Mark showed up with his 2 kids and so did my Aunt Alice with her grandson Marquel. This incited a full blown riot with my cousin Sean. (Reminder: all of these kids are like 5-7) So as I heard the rabble rousing I pulled out my handy dandy star wars watch and estimated in 15 minutes someone would be crying. Sure enough, I was right. I know that when I was young like that my folks NEVER let it get out of hand like that. It was the same number of kids too. (Me, cousin Richard, Stephanie and Daniel) we never got out of hand like that with my folks around. I guess this is the fruit of the new generation of parenting where kids are more free range. Other than that, it was a good day of turkey.

Work: Fun as usual. But John completely altered the work staff except for 3 people. That made working a bit harder with new people. Oh and no one told me, no more Gamestop Warranty on 360's. WTF?! Still good to get some hours in.

Nancy weekend: It was fun to be down there without the worry of work, parking or any other disturbance. Hanging out with Izzy and Joshy for the day was awesome too, I hope they like the cookies and Yu-gi-oh cards.

Hit the jump for my Wii filled break
( In Gaming news: )

So just as a virtual checklist of whats to be done:

• Revolution paper (Due:12/13,1500-2000 words)
• Crusade Paper (Due:12/4, 5-7 pages)
• Bill response (Due: this weekend)
• Print Revised resume (Done as soon as the lab has paper

Not to bad in the long run but I need to start one of these papers this weekend and I've been procrastinating it for 3 weeks. It's not that its going to be that hard but I'm not that interested in writing about Benedict Arnold. Sure hes the great American traitor but 1500 words is just a bit much for something I have no vested interest in. I have the books lined up so today will include a trip to my favorite place, the library. Ugh.

Classes have dragged on as of late. My American Revolution class has silence lasting for minutes because NO ONE CARES. Not even me. So you can imagine when I was so glad when we moved class to the library so we could research. I just went to Nancy's to start some other work. And next week is the Patriot. Wonderful, I just love writing in response to Mel Gibson films.

But all in all its going to be a last sucky week and then break. But even then I get no real break. I'll be working at EB and working on another paper at home. Then I get some decent food, family and BAM I'm back in Oneonta again.

And I just realized Bill is going to drop a paper on us right before break. SON OF A-

So now I have double duty whilst home. ARG. Sorry if I'm being a bit whiny but it's just a bit much to do all at once. At least Communication and Mythology are easy enough for me to manage. So this weekend and next will be a working weekend. Sorry Sunday, looks like something came up.

Gaming news in the cut.

( In Gaming news: )

So my car on the way home decided to fritz on its head lights. Turns out Battery acid had nearly claimed the wiring on it. Of the 3 day break I had I ended up spending about 2 in car repair. It sucked but it gave me a much bigger appreciation of what could of happened if it had gone on much longer. Talking massive repairs here and I don't have time or money for either.

Science lesson of the month: Baking soda+water on batter acid neutralizes it. Science is nifty!

Then Victoria busted...well she was broke before I left but I had no idea to what extent. For some reason whenever I went idle it would lock the screen. So I managed to save all my files and did a fresh reformat. And that means another day of my life lost to this beast. But I didn't lose anything this time so it was a reformat without dramu.

I've been bogged by so much reading, writing and repairing that I've had no time to...anything in the last 4-5 days. Today is the first day that I have a little squeeze room and I have to start research for a paper and a comm project. Ugh. I have all weekend for it but on my work sched. it'll be a mess.

On the positive side Eve's party was a blast..after we figured out where the hell it was. (Go to hell map sites) I bobbed for an apple for the first time ever and I have to hand it to the ladies who are experts at it. The fire was nice too. I love fire side chats anyway but with a few new people it made it quite interesting. And the chef freeman...I think that's his name...he seems like an interesting character.

While I was home I also straightened out my check with Chef. So now I have reserve funds to relax on. It would have been nice 3 weeks ago when I needed it. I took Nancy to the Woodbury Commons while I was there and I think she had a good time. It's one of the few places that's nice to walk in Monroe. Oh and her Anniversary gift finally came, boy was that a dibockle. Next time I'll try to work this out well in advance.

( In Gaming news: )

So as of recent I've traded out my usual DS/ Wii play for my PSP. Scary right? I picked up Final Fantasy Tactic: The War of the Lions This takes me back to a time of crash Bandicoot, cool boarders and Tekken...1. 30 or so hours in the game and I'm only level 50 and only 1 secret character. But then again I have really been power leveling Ramza like crazy because I'd like to see him as a fell knight/ onion knight  by games end. But first I have to get mastery of every other job. And that means a lot of fights. But hell Cloud is still in and now Balthier is too. Not that I'm really that exited for Balthier or Luso (From Tactics Advance 2) they are the spawn of the original tactics, really riding the curtails, but so far Luso has a good intergration with the story and has some decent unit potential.

For those that have played Tactics I was tossing the idea of a Delita cosplay. Not for this year but I've always wanted to do a Tactics character.

Other than that its a lot of school work: papers, readings and a lot of words. But It's all good I think I have a balance worked out at last. let's hope it works out grade wise.

Going home this weekend...really just to bring stuff back and grab a few missed items. Oh and banking...lotta banking.

And one last note: Ebay sucks

     First and foremost is that the Bioshock issue is resolved. Turns out it was just a crappily built card. So now I may enjoy my gene splicing and shoot 'em up game in the solice of my frozen tundra...I mean room. But yes, very good that it works again.
   
    Classes are going well work wise. My American revolution class will be the end of me this semester but Middle ages Kicks Its ASS. Nothing like invasion, swords and sexual misdeeds to get me in a good mood. All my history classes seem to allude to the other so it works out nice. Professors are cool too, American rev is a Mac user though..not sure how I feel about that.
   
     Fragfest is upon us again and this time I have a party! With Nancy, Crystal and Jesse all coming it will make it a blast for sure. And now that I can run Bioshock I have something to play in the down  time. Bring lots of supplies people, you'll need them. (That reminds me that I need to print directions there >_>) But just as a reminder:
Items To bring:
Power Cables
Power Strip
Monitor
Computer
Key Board
Mouse
FOOD
Cat-5 cable 10feet or longer
Game Cds
Chair(optional)
Sleeping crap
Clothes
Toilettries
DS (If you have it)
Items Not to bring:
Alcohol
Speakers
Weapons
Second computer
Second monitor
Projectors
Tables
Items to sell

        So pack well. It's 3 days long and buffet food there is like 7-8 a meal. Might be good for breakfast but stock up ob PB&J and Soda.

So many games to get to this semester. Bioshock, Phoenix Wright 2 and 3, Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions, Guitar Hero 3 aaaaaand Brawl. Wallet is not happy.

And my art...how it suffers. I've had ideas for stuff all summer but nothing is coming to fruition on paper. Oh well, I'll sit and doodle more until I get gold.

P.S. HOLY CRAP IT FLIPZ!!

Being back at school is great, its nice to have actual gamers for room mates. I may be on the other side of campus from Nancy but now all my classes are a stones throw away and the school food store is in like a B line from my door. Pimp.

Classes so far are good, I have a lot of reading to do but I think this summers Potter-cise got me ready for the bulk reading I will be doing. 22 Books so far and 3 more to get before weeks end. Did anyone see the $400 I just had? No? god damn books. All but 2 are used and I still got raped. Oh well, its what my major does, collect books.

And my obsession over Bioshock? Worse. After 4 days of attempting to install a new video card into my PC I had to send it out on RMA to replace it. The tech dude greg was nice as he tried to figure it out but he knows Mac's, why send the mac dud when the PC dude knows what he's doing? So maybe a week from now I can shoot up some big daddy's and set people on fire. That'd make me happy. As sad as that sounds, I want to set people on fire, with my MIND. *sigh* At least I have the DVD and OST.